Poor Jimmy killed himself with a butter knife
He tried once and he tried twice
But by the third time he got it right:
Well it took him half an hour just to cut through one wrist
And was eventually found in a puddle of his own piss
When he was put in the ground the very next day
The whole town came out to say:
‘Ah Jimmy we all knew you were probably gay'
And on the third day; he rose to heaven a most revered saint.
~ G McK